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Chapter 1: The Pain of Separation "Qiang, you know that studying abroad has always been my dream. Now I have this opportunity, why wouldn't I seize it?" FeiFei said with tears in her eyes, her voice still so gentle 。I'm Huang Qiang. Right now, I'm sadly looking at this person in front of me. This is the person who has been with me for four years, no, three and a half years. Now, because they want to study abroad, they are breaking up with me. The tears I just stopped crying are flowing again. I know that no matter how much I persuade them now, it's useless. Our relationship has reached the end and there's no way to stop their departure. 。But I still wasn't giving up. Using a voice tinged with tears, I pleaded, "Fifi, isn't studying abroad that important? You can develop just as well staying in the country! Didn't you already find a job at a company? Please don't go for me, okay?" "No! Qiang, just let me go! Don't you love me? Wasn't your highest ideal to make the other person happy and fulfilled, to give everything to them? Just give everything to me!" Fifi said, her voice firm. 。Yes, I did say that. It was something I said to FeiFei under the moonlight. Now that she has left me, those words hit me like a punch to the gut, leaving me speechless and heartbroken. 。After the graduation ceremony, in this rented room of mine, FeiFei suddenly proposed to me about studying abroad. I knew this was her dream, but both our families were from rural areas and weren't wealthy. We simply couldn't afford it. 。I asked, "Where did the money come from?" Fifi stammered and remained silent for a long time. 。Under my persistent questioning, Fei Fei finally said, "Do you still remember Chen Fu贵? He's from the finance department of the business school..." 。"Chen Fuguai, isn't he just that rich kid?" I thought to myself. He used to be my enemy. He once pursued FeiFei and bought ninety-nine roses every day to deliver to her dorm room. But FeiFei always threw the roses in the trash and ended up choosing me, this poor guy." 。"Does he lend money?" I asked. 。Fifi twisted and turned, finally she gritted her teeth and said: "No, he only said that as long as I agree to be his friend, he would pay for me to study abroad. 。" I heard the news and immediately asked, "You agreed?"
Fei Fei said in a voice as thin as a mosquito, "Hmm!"
I was almost stunned by this sudden news. It took me a long time to recover. I said in a trembling voice, "So... you want to break up with me?"
"I'm sorry, Qiang. I know this is unfair to you, but I really want to study abroad..." 。"Fifi frowned and said," 。I suddenly felt very upset, pacing around the room like an angry lion, roaring: "Just for going abroad, just for that few stinking dollars, are you going to sell our three and a half years of love? Is a simple 'sorry' enough? Have you ever thought about my feelings? What's the difference between this and selling me off?" In the past three and a half years with FeiFei, I had never yelled so loudly before. 。"I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry! Qiang, let's be friends!" Fei Fei was in tears, crying very sadly. 。That day we argued all day long, and it ended without a resolution. The next few days were the same. During the day we would go out together, but as soon as we got back to the apartment, we'd start fighting again. I always tried to persuade FeiFei to stay. After all, in the three and a half years we had been together, we had lived together for two years. I really couldn't bear to let go of this deep connection. 。Today, FeiFei is leaving. Her train leaves at 4:30 this afternoon. I quietly helped pack her things. Over the years, every time she went home for vacation, I was the one who packed. It has become a habit. 。In yesterday's argument, I couldn't persuade FeiFei, and instead, convinced her to part ways amicably and remain good friends. 。But when I was cleaning up, I thought of my happy life in the past, and my cowardly tears flowed again. 。I put Feifei's last piece of clothing into my suitcase, zipped it up, and then turned to look at her quietly. This would be the last time I ever saw her. She was so beautiful, so elegant, with long hair cascading down her back like a waterfall, draped over her shoulders... 。Looking at FeiFei before me, tears welled up in my eyes. Through blurry vision, I saw FeiFei walking towards me, raising her tender fingers like green shoots and gently wiping away my tears. She whispered, "Qiang, I love you! I really do love you. But studying abroad has always been my dream..."I held back my tears and softly replied, "Don't say any more. I'm not blaming you for leaving. I just hate that I'm not capable enough, not rich enough to afford your studies..." 。"No! It's not your fault, Qiang. Let's part ways peacefully. Allow me to dance one last time for you!" After finishing her words, Fei Fei walked towards the computer, played Jacky Cheung's "Kiss Goodbye," and began to gracefully dance in the small room. 。This is a habit we've developed since living together. Every afternoon, FeiFei would dance for me in her room, and I would recite Cao Zhi's "Shen Fu" while watching her: "Her form, as startling as a startled phoenix, graceful like a swimming dragon..." 。Autumn glory, spring pine of Huamiao. 。A smoldering stench of decay hung heavy, obscuring the moon as though by mountains. It drifted aimlessly, like swirling flakes of snow caught in a passing wind. 。...shoulders like chiseled jade, waist like a delicate twine... 。Neck outstretched, complexion like polished jade. 。Without embellishment, pure and simple. 。Her cloud-like bun was towering, and her beautiful brows were delicately connected. 。Outside his dwelling, bright and clear; teeth white as snow, eyes shining with kindness; a smile charming all, he bears the weight of authority. 。Graceful and radiant, her demeanor is serene and composed. 。Bearing, in language 。…The duck flies swiftly, soaring and flitting like a spirit. Its footsteps on the water are light as dust, stirring only ripples. 。Life is impermanent, sometimes dangerous, sometimes peaceful. 。It's a difficult time to advance or retreat, it's like going forward and backward. 。Turning stream, jade-like flow. 。Though her words were unspoken, she exuded an air of quiet grace. 。Her beauty is captivating, making me forget to eat. 。I feel like Cao Zhi's "Shen Fu" was written for Fei Fei. Back then, I would read and recite it, it truly was a kind of... but today, I don't have the heart to watch dancing. My mind is filled with sadness. 。I remember once, FeiFei was dancing and having a drink. In the end, she got so into it that she didn't even care about her drink anymore, just danced for me. She moved like waves, captivating my soul. 。Fei Fei kept giving me meaningful looks, which made my heart race and body heat up. I immediately reacted, becoming erect and stiff, like a tent. 。I immediately rushed over, grabbed him, and administered justice on the spot. 。That time our passions were extremely high, unprecedented **we did it for a very long time, the entire afternoon and evening we were on top of each other, I don't remember how many times, only that we stopped until we were both too exhausted to go on. 。As I was thinking about this, I suddenly felt a response. The dragon column began to grow, point by point, becoming thicker and pulsing, like a snake searching for something. 。Its changes caused a primal, rhythmic growth in my mind, and fire slowly began to burn. It quickly consumed me. 。The more innocent I laugh, the wilder I become. There's a place called x, where some things are understood and said words can't be fulfilled. In the blink of an eye, I find a face that is unfamiliar and no longer resembles the past. My world starts snowing, cold enough to make me unable to last another day, cold enough that even hidden regrets become so obvious. 。Jacky Cheung sang with all his might, this sad song was like a basin of cold water poured on my head, my fire was completely extinguished, I was suddenly taken out of the flames. 。"Oh my goodness! How could I still have this kind of thought now? I'm so foolish!" 。I patted my head, shaking it slightly, ashamed of myself for having such thoughts at this critical moment. I didn't dare to look up at Fifi who was swirling and dancing around me. 。Fei Fei slightly raised the corners of her mouth, a sweet and innocent smile, so pure and flawless. I suddenly felt a chill, like falling into an ice cellar. Before, when I listened to Jacky Cheung sing this song, I always couldn't find resonance. Now, I feel that Jacky Cheung seems to know I would have this kind of tribulation, as if he wrote it especially for me. 。At this time, Fei Fei took a light step forward, her willow waist swaying gently. Her right hand suddenly moved forward, lightly pinching the collar with her thumb and index finger. As she twisted her waist slightly, she slowly pulled down, revealing her white chest and pure white bra, which followed downwards. On each cup were embroidered many flowers, with two mischievous little bees buzzing around them. 。Two cups enveloped Fei Fei's proud pair of breasts, which were already firm and now seemed even more towering. 。Fei Fei's bra size is 34D, and she likes to wear half-cup bras, so she always has half of her snowy white... coming out from under the cup. 。
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